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Anime physics. Cloak and hair blowing in opposite directions. Antigravity leaps. Tromping through snow in skimpies.

I challenge you to provide a CREATIVE (read: silly) explanation for some of the weirdly bizarre quirks of Final Fantasy, as a noble representative of the anime genre.

Examples: Seymour's and Nooj's hair, how _____'s costume stays on, where Auron puts his sword (AHEM, shush), Rinoa's ability to dangle from broken rockfaces for an hour or so, breathing (and singing!) on the airship hull without oxygen masks.

Please include spoiler warnings. :)

 

Comments

( 5 comments — Leave a comment )
owlmoose
Jul. 7th, 2006 10:10 pm (UTC)
Cold weather in skimpies: Clearly, a black mage can use her control over the elements to regulate her body temperature, both internally and externally, therefore eliminating the need for coats and other wraps in cold weather. Then, by resonating water molecules in the air, she can extend this temperature influence to the others in her party. This ability can extend over enough distance to easily cover several other people.

(This the kind of thing you had in mind?)
auronlu
Jul. 7th, 2006 11:39 pm (UTC)
Reverse the polarity of the neutron flow!

Yes, that almost makes (too much) sense. So, working hypothesis is that Lulu is a walking MRI. Probably very useful if anyone fractures something!
cygna_hime
Jul. 7th, 2006 10:23 pm (UTC)
These are fun.
Alright, about the sword thing:

I am going to cheat and appropriate an explanation from Highlander fandom, another canon in which characters carry swords around as a matter of course, and can produce these swords on demand even when there is evidently nowhere they could be hidden. The explanation for this is an alternate dimension known as K-Space (Katana-Space), in which expert swordsmen and -women learn to store their weaponry. It was an extremely secret technique, but since people who learned it started to pass it around a lot, it has become more common.

*nods*

And as for the hair, characters in anime universes, including Final Fantasy, secrete a hair-gel-like substance from their heads, which holds their hair at all times in one genetically encoded style. Although the hair may be shorter or longer, it will never leave this style, due to the action of the secretion, which is called by medical professionals in the anime world crinitin. Another substance, a pigment known as fucin, is present only in the hair of characters with dyed hair, unnatural hair colors or color combinations not found in nature, and ensures that the character's roots never begin to show and their hair remains the same color at all times. (This is why Tidus does not have three inches of brown hair by the end of FFX.)

As everyone knows, regular laws of physics do not apply in cartoon-land, of which video-game-land is a subsection. Instead, they have the Cartoon Laws of Physics.

I think Lulu holds her top on by using the Double-Sided Tape Spell, the second spell any female black mage learns. (The first, even more important, is the Tampon Spell.)

The sad thing is, I've actually thought about most of these things before.
auronlu
Jul. 7th, 2006 11:36 pm (UTC)
Re: These are fun.
*nods wisely*

You have obviously thought these things through with great care. Your explanation of K-space is immensely helpful in confirming for me a parallel theory I had about Lara Croft's impossibly tiny backpack and impossibly large boobs, which I assumed were somehow functioning in tandem to store all her ammunition, grenades, and weapons, up to and including the rocket launcher. Possibly the breasts serve as a counterweight for the portable hole she's keeping in the backpack.

My friends and I posited a special form of superglue for the Elves of Elfquest.

Scary thing is, I had also thought of the Tampon Spell... or rather, some kind of potion, since Yuna probably needed it too...
drkangelyahriel
Jul. 8th, 2006 11:31 pm (UTC)
Sephiroth in Last Order *spoiler?* and I sort of ramble on from there...
My theory on Sephiroth's defiance of physics/gravity during the vs Zack fight in the reactor in LO:
We all know Sephiroth hates the Planet, the people on it, etc. We can assume he doesn't respect the Planet either (what with the whole Meteor-wounding-the-Planet scheme). So, his disrespect for the Planet is so deep that he can disrespect even the laws of gravity - hence his ability to stand on ceilings, etc.

Just thought of this one:
Mako.
The more Mako a person has in his/her body, the more they defy physics/gravity/etc. Sephiroth likely has the highest concentration of Mako (essense of "cool"?), thus the bangs leik woah, cape flair, windswept hair, jumping, swordfighting, etc.
Cloud was also exposed to a LOT of Mako over the course of FFVII. That's what makes his hair so dangerously spikey.
Zack had Mako treatments too, but we don't know what was wrong with that boy *shakes head*
Hmm Zack and Cloud both exposed to Mako.
Zack and Cloud both weild freakishly large swords.
Coincidence, or scientific evidence?
Sephiroth, as well, though he weilds a freakishly LONG sword.

Of course, the Mako bros. (Kadaj, Yazoo, Loz). It seems they just crawled out of the LifeStream at the Northern Crater, so basically just Mako, Jenova, and Sephiroth's will. That would explain the awesome fighting skills.

Again with Mako...
Mako is the Lifestream, and the Lifestream is the spirits of those who have returned to the Planet.
I'm sure a number of those spirits were martial artists, swordfighters, etc. Wouldn't one infused (or made of) Mako then gain the knowledge of these skilled fighters?
That doesn't explain why, aside from SOLDIER, the ShinRa army SUCKS. =/ Not enough Mako I suppose.
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